how do we cope??

I dont want to bring anyone down ok,I just wanted to get this out of my system,as you may or may not know my lil gran is almost at the end of her 96 year old life,ok so we dont expect anyone to live forever,the inevitible is of course coming,I just dont know how I shall cope when it does,I worry for my mum,I think though that deep down she is pretty strong,however sometimes it takes its toll like anything else in life,it just seems so surreal to me,my gran was like my friend too, I always visited her, I also used to phone her every sunday,she liked that,as did my mum as well,although every night she would call her,I know that it will be a blessed relief,she wont be in any pain anymore,no more worries,she will be at peace,the way I look at it,we are celebrating a fantastic life as well as mourning a great loss at the same time,we can be happy in ourselves that she is at peace and with her husband and daughter as well.

Sorry people,dont wanna cause any sadness or depression to any of you,I just wanted to get it off my chest,make me feel a little better and to prepare myself for what is coming.

The way that I look at it is, that she is going to hopefully a better place. When we all die we go to either another world or come back to the world we came from another way. Like you said everyone has to die. What you need to do is find a way to cope, may it be in a task or a way to remember her. I wish you the best of luck.

I wont say I know how you'll feel even though I've lost two grandparents everyone's grief is personal.
I will say that you will find a way to deal with it. I have fond memories of them but they were both very ill at the end and I don't want to think of them like that. I want to remember the times they made me happy. The way my grandad could do conjuring tricks and the way my gran looked after me when I was sick.
It's hard but you will get through it. Be strong.

Thanks Draco,your words are comforting,of course,these things are incredibly difficult to deal with,we all deal with it in our own way,im quite a strong person really,I reckon when it actually happens it will be relief mixed with alot of sadness obviously,but,we shall celebrate her incredible life!

[tanith88]

Hi Ruby, as Draco said we all cope differently. My eldest nephew was killed in a road accident (over 20 years ago now) and I always feel that he is still there just that I haven't seen him for a long time. (Although he comes to me in dreams sometimes and tells me things he wants me to know.) You don't forget them and I know at times I still feel the loss and sadness but you do cope.

*Big hug for you*

The only advice I can give you is to take one day at a time. You can get your head around it but there is no way to predict how your heart will cope. Just let your emotions come. Be open with your emotions - dont hold them in. Most improtantly....talk...lean on the people around you (inc..us) Talk about your nan, talk about how you are feeling etc...
*hugs* We are always here no matter what -x-

Can I just say,you people are the best!! your words are more than just kind,its extremely comforting,Iam at present,doing pretty ok,I reckon I shall be just fine even in the darkest hours that lie ahead,you guys are great,even though I dont actually know you,I feel a connection.

[RAVENGIRL]

Oh Ruby I am so sorry.

I didn't know what to say and still don't,but if you need someone to talk to I am here for you.

((((((((((Hugs)))))))))))

Hey RG its totally cool,honestly,im doing pretty ok as it goes,for the time being anyway,its whenever I go to see my gran that I cant cope all that well,once I leave im a bit down but I pick myself up,im quite strong,I found that out after being with a jerk ass for 10 years!!! I truly was quite proud of myself for that,i was relieved and sad and angry,but,6 and a half years later im just dandy!!

It must be a horrible situation for you be in. When she does go be sad, when she is gone be happy her pain is over and look forward to spending the rest of your life remembering all the good times and sharing them with your kids.

*hugs*

Thanks Frankie,much appreciated,yep we both shall remember her extremely fondly my daughter and I,I shall always remember the times when I was younger, I used to stay with her on saturday night,I loved doing that,she used to make brilliant homemade soup,then, on sunday mornings she would make lovely breakfasts,yep,they were great times,great times.

Hi everyone,just to let you all know my gran sadly passed away this morning just before 6am,I had switched on my phone when I got up,my dad had texted me,just before I read it,i knew something was wrong because he doesn't really text me,just my mum really,I was inconsolable,I was in a right old state,its hard even though I knew it was only a matter of time before it would happen,I had to contact the jobcentre to explain I wouldn't be up this morning to sign,they are such hard hearted cruel bastards!! I have to go up before 4.30 today,they said it could affect my benefit,so,as you do,I have to go along this afternoon,I should be ok,I have to be,otherwise they could just not pay me anything,I would like to see how they would react to news of a family bereavement,anyway my gran is at peace now,no more suffering,no more pain and my mum will be happy that she isn't suffering anymore,the hard part of course is the funeral,which I think may be Thursday of next week,not too sure yet,anyway I shall just get on with my day.

So sorry to hear that *hugs*

Sending you positive thoughts, take care of yourself

Thanks Frankie,your a star,im kind of ok now,alot calmer than I was,just trying to get my head round it all,the funeral will be a celebration of her wonderful life,a truly wonderful person.

*Big Hugs* my thoughts are with you & your family xxx Don't forget we are all here hun anytime-x-